How to make almost 1 million in 5 years?

All this while when I am in hiding, I have been thinking… How do I make more money?

Recently the election just happened and Mama Sim told me that if I were to stand for election, she would have voted for me…

I heard that our Members of Parliament earns 15,000 per month. That would mean 180,000 per year and a total of 900,000 for a 5-year term…

That would make me an almost millionaire…

Ms Mill overheard Mama Sim and told me that she will also throw in her vote for me plus her mother’s. Ok that is 2 more votes.

Now that I have at least 3 votes (assuming Mama Sim is changing her Malaysian citizenship to Singapore in 5 years time which is highly unlikely)…

I think I am on a great start to my political career...

I have already thought of 2 ways to strike it rich for the next election.

Strike It Rich Plan 1
Contest against Singapore’s famous figure Lee Kuan Yew in Tanjong Pagar GRC. Everyone loves a David vs Goliath, Jack and the Beanstalk story right…

So I am surely going to get on the front page, back page, middle page of all the national newspapers and that is priceless…

After getting 1% of the votes in the election, having all the media lime light plus forfeiting my election deposit of $16,000 (I heard somewhere you need an election deposit and it will be forfeited if your votes are below 12% I think), I am well on my way to publishing a book named “Why I contest against Lee Kuan Yew?”

That should make me $1,000,000 in book sales, speaker fees, celebrity appearances and poster sales…

Strike It Rich Plan 2
Contest in any area, and during speeches on stage keep criticizing the government policies.

Ok this is nothing special. I mean the news will report what you say anyway, so to differentiate yourself from the rest, you should bring all your personal problems on stage.

That should make all the audience notice you…

List of dramatic stuff you can bring onto the stage,

1. Have an affair, admit it on stage, kneel down and ask for forgiveness. It shows that you are only human, deserve a second chance and probably a chance to run the country…

2. Cry at the slightest thing, at anything, just cry, it will show that you are a compassionate, emotional and also someone who has the heart to run the country…

3. Ok this one has nothing to do with drama, but you must have a dramatic name especially a name like ‘Yam Ah Mee’ (I did not make this up, you can google his name). You can create this dramatic package by having good looks, a vintage hairstyle and most importantly a killer name… You will go viral…


Now the first thing I need to do is to start a political party… How about Pineapple Tat Party (PTP)......