We were eating lunch together, then she told me she would wait for that guy until next year June. I look on nonchalantly eating my food. I was actually surprised that she told me this. She actually wanted to wait forever, even if nothing comes out of it.
Her best friend told her it was foolish to do so, what if she waited for 10 years and he got married or someone better came along, is she going to give it up? She would be foolish to waste her time and life. She looked at me, and asked what I think. I looked away and answered, that she should wait as long as she like.....
I lied.... I don't believe in waiting for someone because if something is not going to work out, it won't and waiting doesn't help. I told her that the person she is waiting for is her husband, so its worth waiting. Not long ago, she told me she was getting a divorce and she is enjoying singlehood. We would always talk about the merits of being single, like how we were not obliged to go to our partner's house even though we would love to stay at home and no need to report about what we are doing.
I told her I am also waiting for something....Waiting for my guilt to be overcome. I am waiting for my ex-girlfriend to find a boyfriend first before I move on. She told me I was foolish to do that but hey, who wanted to actually wait for someone forever??
Anyway the trend for me seem to be that after a relationship, I would take at least a year to bounce back. I thought about her next June deadline for waiting. That seem like a long time. As to why I lied about my opinion, it was for a selfish reason....
Saturday, October 21, 2006
Tuesday, October 17, 2006
Pieces
As I lie on my hospital bed, looking up at the ceiling fan spinning, memories flash past my mind. I saw her petite figure standing and leaning against the glass panel on the train. I thought to myself, what if I had not pretend not to hear what she said that day on the train, would things be different? She said those words,
Her: "I would be sad if I didn't see you tomorrow."
Me: "Huh? What did you say? I didn't heard what you say..."
Her: "Nothing." (shaking her head and then looking sideways)
I came back to reality, then my vision blurred and another image appeared, I was at the traffic lights waiting to cross the road and it was an afternoon. I made a call to a girl,
Me: "Hello."
Her: "Hello." (a sleepy voice)
Me: "You just woke up?"
Her: "Yah... Slept quite late last night because I was at a chalet."
Me: "Orh... Erm... Sorry about that night that I got drunk."
Her: "Its ok..."
Me: "What happened? Because I can't remember."
Her: "I don't want to talk about it."
If I had not pretend to forget about what happened that night. Would things be different?
Slowly everything changes and I was at an underpass. A girl was wearing purple clothes, she took off her sandals because she has injured her foot and walk barefooted beside me giggling and I was laughing.
Me: "Wah lau eh.... Its embarassing lei to do that in public."
Her: "Hehe.... Never mind lah."
Would things be different if she doesn't have a boyfriend?
Then I found myself at a cafe and a fair girl in white top sat opposite of me. She was eating vegetable spaghetti and she told me,
Her: "Take some more lah." (smiling)
Me: "Orh... Ok." (obliging and eating the spaghetti)
Her: "Hahahaha." (suddenly laughing)
Me: "What is so funny?" (very puzzled)
Her: "Nothing." (shaking her head like a little girl and still laughing)
Me: "Huh?"
As we walk back from lunch, we were both laughing very hard at something until my stomach hurts. It was happy and fun. Would things be different if she wasn't married before?
I was lying on my right side on the bed and I was woken up by a soft kiss to my lips. I slowly open my eyes and saw a girl wearing black and hair tied back, standing up from a kneeing position beside my bed. It was a familiar figure,
Me: "Are you going to work?" (sleepy voice)
Her: "Yah... You continue to sleep some more lah." (her beautiful face smiling)
Me: "I want another kiss." (smiling)
Would things be different if we were still together?
Mr Wall, my campmate, confidante and friend's image then appeared in front of me. He said,
Mr Wall: "Do you want to be lying on the hospital bed when you are old and think what could have happened? People think they have a lot of time but before you know you are already old and fragile."
I looked at the computer screen and thought about what he said yesterday.......
Her: "I would be sad if I didn't see you tomorrow."
Me: "Huh? What did you say? I didn't heard what you say..."
Her: "Nothing." (shaking her head and then looking sideways)
I came back to reality, then my vision blurred and another image appeared, I was at the traffic lights waiting to cross the road and it was an afternoon. I made a call to a girl,
Me: "Hello."
Her: "Hello." (a sleepy voice)
Me: "You just woke up?"
Her: "Yah... Slept quite late last night because I was at a chalet."
Me: "Orh... Erm... Sorry about that night that I got drunk."
Her: "Its ok..."
Me: "What happened? Because I can't remember."
Her: "I don't want to talk about it."
If I had not pretend to forget about what happened that night. Would things be different?
Slowly everything changes and I was at an underpass. A girl was wearing purple clothes, she took off her sandals because she has injured her foot and walk barefooted beside me giggling and I was laughing.
Me: "Wah lau eh.... Its embarassing lei to do that in public."
Her: "Hehe.... Never mind lah."
Would things be different if she doesn't have a boyfriend?
Then I found myself at a cafe and a fair girl in white top sat opposite of me. She was eating vegetable spaghetti and she told me,
Her: "Take some more lah." (smiling)
Me: "Orh... Ok." (obliging and eating the spaghetti)
Her: "Hahahaha." (suddenly laughing)
Me: "What is so funny?" (very puzzled)
Her: "Nothing." (shaking her head like a little girl and still laughing)
Me: "Huh?"
As we walk back from lunch, we were both laughing very hard at something until my stomach hurts. It was happy and fun. Would things be different if she wasn't married before?
I was lying on my right side on the bed and I was woken up by a soft kiss to my lips. I slowly open my eyes and saw a girl wearing black and hair tied back, standing up from a kneeing position beside my bed. It was a familiar figure,
Me: "Are you going to work?" (sleepy voice)
Her: "Yah... You continue to sleep some more lah." (her beautiful face smiling)
Me: "I want another kiss." (smiling)
Would things be different if we were still together?
Mr Wall, my campmate, confidante and friend's image then appeared in front of me. He said,
Mr Wall: "Do you want to be lying on the hospital bed when you are old and think what could have happened? People think they have a lot of time but before you know you are already old and fragile."
I looked at the computer screen and thought about what he said yesterday.......
Thursday, October 12, 2006
Pictures of Your Object of Desire
Just now a friend sent me a photo of his object of affection through msn. While I was looking at it using the Windows Picture and Fax viewer, I realise that I have some pictures of my friends' objects of desire while scrolling. Come to think of it, my friends sometimes send me pictures of girls they like.
Ironically I do not have any photos of girls that I like, instead I have photos of girls that my friends like. I wonder how they got their photos, they are not photos that they took with them but photos of the girl alone or with someone else. I even saw one which is a IC photo!
While I only have my memory, they can take out the photo to admire when they don't see them. Seriously how did you all get the photos ah?? Because I never thought of asking for photos or even taking them from friends.
Strange isn't it.....
Ironically I do not have any photos of girls that I like, instead I have photos of girls that my friends like. I wonder how they got their photos, they are not photos that they took with them but photos of the girl alone or with someone else. I even saw one which is a IC photo!
While I only have my memory, they can take out the photo to admire when they don't see them. Seriously how did you all get the photos ah?? Because I never thought of asking for photos or even taking them from friends.
Strange isn't it.....
Wednesday, October 11, 2006
The stories of a glass heart and a fence
Someone once described a person's heart as a glass. When it is broken the first time, it breaks into a few pieces, then someone comes along and stick it back. The second time it breaks and yet again, someone tries to mend it back. Though they try to fix it back as well as they could, the cracks/scars still can be seen. Each time it breaks, it breaks into smaller pieces and when mended beack, more and more lines/scars can be seen. This glass can never be perfect again...
---- Extract from Rayvin's blog
Once I read a story about a father who told his son who had a bad temper,
"Son, for eveytime you get angry and loses your temper on someone, I want you to hit a nail into the fence in front of our house."
He followed his father's instruction and hit a nail into the fence everytime he got angry with someone. Soon the fence was full of nails. Then the father told the son,
"Now I also want you to extract a nail from the fence everytime you do something good for someone."
The son obeyed his father's instruction and soon find it an achievement to be extracting out the nails one by one. Soon all the nails on the fence are extracted out. The son was happy and ran to his father,
"Father, father, all the nails from the fence are gone!"
Smiling at his son, the father followed his son to look at the fence and asked him,
"Do you see those holes on the fence?" The son replied, "Yes father."
"Eveytime you lose your temper on someone, its like hitting a nail into a person's heart, you may have extracted the nails out but the holes will always be there and can never be mend."
To me, it implies the consequences of hurting someone and also being hurt yourself. I think through what I did before and I am sorry.... Feeling remorseful these few days... God please forgive me and people please forgive me....
---- Extract from Rayvin's blog
Once I read a story about a father who told his son who had a bad temper,
"Son, for eveytime you get angry and loses your temper on someone, I want you to hit a nail into the fence in front of our house."
He followed his father's instruction and hit a nail into the fence everytime he got angry with someone. Soon the fence was full of nails. Then the father told the son,
"Now I also want you to extract a nail from the fence everytime you do something good for someone."
The son obeyed his father's instruction and soon find it an achievement to be extracting out the nails one by one. Soon all the nails on the fence are extracted out. The son was happy and ran to his father,
"Father, father, all the nails from the fence are gone!"
Smiling at his son, the father followed his son to look at the fence and asked him,
"Do you see those holes on the fence?" The son replied, "Yes father."
"Eveytime you lose your temper on someone, its like hitting a nail into a person's heart, you may have extracted the nails out but the holes will always be there and can never be mend."
To me, it implies the consequences of hurting someone and also being hurt yourself. I think through what I did before and I am sorry.... Feeling remorseful these few days... God please forgive me and people please forgive me....
Monday, October 09, 2006
Looking Forward to Something Everyday
Have you ever had the feeling of looking forward to something? A big football game, meeting with old friends or a birthday party are occasional events. What I meant is the everyday thing. What I look forward to everyday is lunch. Not because of food but because I look forward to eating with a girl. I enjoy having lunch with her because everytime we would have funny things to talk about and something hilarious to laugh at. It was fun just being with her and I enjoy her company. Lunch is always happy.
Not too long ago, I remember that I used to look forward to lunch with another girl, we would always engage in bantering. Then when lunch came, we would go to explore various places to have lunch, we once walk from Raffles Place to as far as Tanjong Pagar to have lunch. She was what I looked forward to lunch. I enjoy her company alot. Then she left....
A few years ago, I used to looked forward to PE in school because I will get to see my ex-girlfriend then who at that time is still not my girlfriend. We were from different classes so PE is a great opportunity for me to see her and converse with her. One day, she changed PE class, of course I was disappointed. At that time, I thought maybe thats it, we won't see each other again. But luck has it, that we share common friends, so I would have an excuse to keep in contact with her.
Things are a bit different now. I don't know its my ego or my pride (are they the same?) or I am just lazy. I just find no reason nor strength to keep in contact with people whom I really enjoy their company, after they have left.
Anyway I don't look forward to lunch anymore because she has left too......
Not too long ago, I remember that I used to look forward to lunch with another girl, we would always engage in bantering. Then when lunch came, we would go to explore various places to have lunch, we once walk from Raffles Place to as far as Tanjong Pagar to have lunch. She was what I looked forward to lunch. I enjoy her company alot. Then she left....
A few years ago, I used to looked forward to PE in school because I will get to see my ex-girlfriend then who at that time is still not my girlfriend. We were from different classes so PE is a great opportunity for me to see her and converse with her. One day, she changed PE class, of course I was disappointed. At that time, I thought maybe thats it, we won't see each other again. But luck has it, that we share common friends, so I would have an excuse to keep in contact with her.
Things are a bit different now. I don't know its my ego or my pride (are they the same?) or I am just lazy. I just find no reason nor strength to keep in contact with people whom I really enjoy their company, after they have left.
Anyway I don't look forward to lunch anymore because she has left too......
Sunday, October 08, 2006
Hello Kitty (Part 1)
When I first saw her, the first thing I said to her was,
Me: "So you were the one who anyhow throw my apps??" (smile)
Ms Kitty: "Huh?" (giving me a blank look)
Me: "Those (credit card)applications that were pass to me by my part timers that Saturday."
Ms Kitty: "Orh..." (smiling with no remorse at all, those are $$ you know) -_-"
It was a simple introduction, a beautiful smile and I could remember it clearly that was in June. She was the customer service officer(CSO) then taking care of the credit card retail hub and I the Sales Officer.
The second time I saw her at the same place, brochures littered around the floor and she was picking them up and I said,
Me: "You look helpless, do you need my help?"
Ms Kitty: "Hahahaha.... Ok." (laughing)
She has a demure and girlish appearance, slim with long hair. When she goes for lunch, I would mann the retail hub for her and everytime something wrong would happen, printer spoil, fax machine not working, photocopying of vouchers not done properly etc.... And then she is the kind that panics easily. -_-" Everytime we will find it funny to laugh at and we would accuse each other of being the jinx.
For weeks, we would often see each other a few times at the same place.....
Me: "So you were the one who anyhow throw my apps??" (smile)
Ms Kitty: "Huh?" (giving me a blank look)
Me: "Those (credit card)applications that were pass to me by my part timers that Saturday."
Ms Kitty: "Orh..." (smiling with no remorse at all, those are $$ you know) -_-"
It was a simple introduction, a beautiful smile and I could remember it clearly that was in June. She was the customer service officer(CSO) then taking care of the credit card retail hub and I the Sales Officer.
The second time I saw her at the same place, brochures littered around the floor and she was picking them up and I said,
Me: "You look helpless, do you need my help?"
Ms Kitty: "Hahahaha.... Ok." (laughing)
She has a demure and girlish appearance, slim with long hair. When she goes for lunch, I would mann the retail hub for her and everytime something wrong would happen, printer spoil, fax machine not working, photocopying of vouchers not done properly etc.... And then she is the kind that panics easily. -_-" Everytime we will find it funny to laugh at and we would accuse each other of being the jinx.
For weeks, we would often see each other a few times at the same place.....
Monday, October 02, 2006
Credit Card, Dream Girl and Lily
Me: "Do you accept NETS?
Indian Waiter: "Erm... what is NETS??" (looking stumped with an Indian accent)
Me: "You know NETS??" (givng him a look of hint and as if repeating the word NETS would enlighten him)
Indian Waiter: "........." (an even stumpier look)
Ms Lily looking at the Indian waiter, thought that he might not be able to comprehend what is NETS until the end of the world, then took her OCBC Titanium Card (the power to take control) and save him. Curiously he knows what is a credit card but not NETS!? I mean who doesn't use NETS??
This time a waitress came back with our bill. I can see the waitress is a smart girl because she puts the bill in front of me expecting me to sign. I will be very rich in the future but not now, at least not in the restaurant at that moment. She spot the potential in me.
Me: "The card is hers." (refering to Ms Lily)
Ms Lily: "Does his name sounds like Ms Lily." (gigiling)
Filipino Waitress: "Usually its the young guy who pays." (talking with an Filipino accent and smiling)
Me: "She is paying for me." (looking proud about it)
Me: "I am a lucky man." :)
Ms Lily laughing......
We then went to NATAS because my manager was there, so we went to visit his booth and she wanted to see some travel brochures. Then I spotted my dream girl..... the Titanium girl..... the cover girl on the Rewards Catalogue..... the girl that I always see on my desk in the morning. She was wearing a red rimmed spec, haiz... very auntie. She ask me to buy some milk from her but I rejected her... Sorry I won't buy them just because you are my dream girl... (strong will power)
Later we went Orchard for shopping and I got myself a pair of Geox shoes. With their shoe technology, they promise that by wearing them, your feet will feel cool because of all those holes under the sole. If you are thinking about water seeping in, its not possible because of osmosis. Sounds good to me so I bought them at a not so low price. So it better work, if not I will burn down the shop.
Oh yah by the way Ms Lily make me help her take 2 bags of Nescafe, some travel brochures and an ugly bag to walk around Orchard. I have no choice because she buys me lunch, treats me in office, promise to buy me a cup and give me sweets. People I would love to write more but Ms Lily will be reading this and then she would start throwing ...... erm..... mooncakes at me?
Indian Waiter: "Erm... what is NETS??" (looking stumped with an Indian accent)
Me: "You know NETS??" (givng him a look of hint and as if repeating the word NETS would enlighten him)
Indian Waiter: "........." (an even stumpier look)
Ms Lily looking at the Indian waiter, thought that he might not be able to comprehend what is NETS until the end of the world, then took her OCBC Titanium Card (the power to take control) and save him. Curiously he knows what is a credit card but not NETS!? I mean who doesn't use NETS??
This time a waitress came back with our bill. I can see the waitress is a smart girl because she puts the bill in front of me expecting me to sign. I will be very rich in the future but not now, at least not in the restaurant at that moment. She spot the potential in me.
Me: "The card is hers." (refering to Ms Lily)
Ms Lily: "Does his name sounds like Ms Lily." (gigiling)
Filipino Waitress: "Usually its the young guy who pays." (talking with an Filipino accent and smiling)
Me: "She is paying for me." (looking proud about it)
Me: "I am a lucky man." :)
Ms Lily laughing......
We then went to NATAS because my manager was there, so we went to visit his booth and she wanted to see some travel brochures. Then I spotted my dream girl..... the Titanium girl..... the cover girl on the Rewards Catalogue..... the girl that I always see on my desk in the morning. She was wearing a red rimmed spec, haiz... very auntie. She ask me to buy some milk from her but I rejected her... Sorry I won't buy them just because you are my dream girl... (strong will power)
Later we went Orchard for shopping and I got myself a pair of Geox shoes. With their shoe technology, they promise that by wearing them, your feet will feel cool because of all those holes under the sole. If you are thinking about water seeping in, its not possible because of osmosis. Sounds good to me so I bought them at a not so low price. So it better work, if not I will burn down the shop.
Oh yah by the way Ms Lily make me help her take 2 bags of Nescafe, some travel brochures and an ugly bag to walk around Orchard. I have no choice because she buys me lunch, treats me in office, promise to buy me a cup and give me sweets. People I would love to write more but Ms Lily will be reading this and then she would start throwing ...... erm..... mooncakes at me?
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